Top Ten Tips For Making It In Hollywood (From Owen Wilson)

10. Stay positive; develop your craft... ah, who am I
kidding? Work hard sucking up to rich idiots who can
help your career

9. When someone sees one of my movies, I call them at home
the next day to thank them

8. Four words: Pantene Moisture Renewal Shampoo

7. Don't hassle the Hoff

6. Make a sex tape. Folks love to see famous people doin'
it

5. Here's what I did: I answered an ad in the newspaper
for "movie stars"

4. Get yourself a sneezing monkey

3. Avoid taxes by declaring yourself a church

2. Don't miss a chance to shamelessly promote your work -
and go see the hilarious new film "Marley & Me," now
playing at a theater near you

1. Try to do something funny on Leno