A FEW SIMPLE RULES FOR HAPPY LIVING:

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting
someone else to hold the vegetables while you chop.

A mouse trap placed on top of your alarm clock will prevent
you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit
the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives.
You'll be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and duct tape.
If it doesn't move and it should, use the WD-40. If it
shouldn't move and it does, use the duct tape.

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical
problem.


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